I don't often write about calls we run, but every now and then I feel compelled. We ran an MO the other night, and without violating the guys privacy rights, let me give the gist of his story:
He went to bed about midnight because he was "sleepy". At some point after this he was "made unconscious" by someone or something from outer space. During his "unconscious time", the gentleman believed that the aforementioned person / or entity, applied some "grease" to his "anus region". The fellow was at pains to point out to us the he is "not gay, nor interested in any gay type things". The alleged (I say alleged, because my partner and I politely declined to perform an examination of the "greasy" area) anal grease was still present we were told, though the fellow denied that the intruder, shall we say; intruded any further. Our patient did explain that this has been happening quite often, and felt that the police department was "maybe not taking me seriously". Mr "X' was unable to offer any clue as to the possible origin of the "space invaders" ( my pun), though he did not dispute my conjecture that a space traveler from the planet Astroglide did this to him. My partner suggested some connection with Uranus, while I offered that I was pretty sure we could nail the point of origin down to somewhere in the KY star system.
We transported our patient to a local emergency room,where we suggested he might benefit from a probing examination; though not in a gay way. I suggested that he try sleeping with a guard dog as I do, pointing out that in over 7 years of sharing my bed with my pooch, my naughty place has yet to wake up greasy.
He went to bed about midnight because he was "sleepy". At some point after this he was "made unconscious" by someone or something from outer space. During his "unconscious time", the gentleman believed that the aforementioned person / or entity, applied some "grease" to his "anus region". The fellow was at pains to point out to us the he is "not gay, nor interested in any gay type things". The alleged (I say alleged, because my partner and I politely declined to perform an examination of the "greasy" area) anal grease was still present we were told, though the fellow denied that the intruder, shall we say; intruded any further. Our patient did explain that this has been happening quite often, and felt that the police department was "maybe not taking me seriously". Mr "X' was unable to offer any clue as to the possible origin of the "space invaders" ( my pun), though he did not dispute my conjecture that a space traveler from the planet Astroglide did this to him. My partner suggested some connection with Uranus, while I offered that I was pretty sure we could nail the point of origin down to somewhere in the KY star system.
We transported our patient to a local emergency room,where we suggested he might benefit from a probing examination; though not in a gay way. I suggested that he try sleeping with a guard dog as I do, pointing out that in over 7 years of sharing my bed with my pooch, my naughty place has yet to wake up greasy.
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