When The Broken Hearted People Say Whoop Whoop

I saw another fine example of what love really is yesterday. We took an 80 something lady from a nursing home after a wheelchair acident (sounds funny, but it happens). She was demented,but quite able to have a nice conversation with me about the past..just no real idea about who, what, or where she was today. That seems common with the ALZ population, at least before they are all the way gone. Her elderly husband met us at the hospital, and had an obvoius concern and tenderness for his wife. I felt that he was still seeing the girl he fell in love with how ever long ago, even though all I could see was an old fat lady with a bloody nose. We once ran a call at a resturant for an older man and his wife. They were having a quiet meal when she suddenly sat down on the floor, began flapping her arms, and yelling whoop whoop whoop! The old fellow told us she does that quite a bit, but he still takes her to dinner now and then because " that's what husbands and wifes do". That's love, that's the stuff that lasts; not the nonsense Tee Vee tries to sell about mo sex, mo money, mo better. I do remember the SAME LOOK of sadness on the faces of those two husbands ; it is hard to see beauty slowly disolve.

Inside The Beltway Smell A Rat Test

See if you can guess the answers:

I took this picture last spring:

A. Outside a Chuck E. Cheese in Chev E. Chase

B. By the Willard Hotel

C. Before the WHCA Dinner at the Hinkley Hilton


Inside the costume is:

A. Judy Miller

B. Mitt Romney (extra credit if you get the joke)

C. A former Today Show weatherman with the last name of Scott

D. Just another nut (or all of the above)

Another Huckster From Hope, and A Choice of Cancer Or Polio

The chattering classes are beginning to notice Mike Huckabee, the slim fast former Arkansas Gov, and Repub POTUS wanna-hucka-bee. I thought the guy had a shot months ago when I saw him with Bill Maher. He looks like Kevin Spacey, has a sense of humor, and he hides his extreme positions well. I can't help but like the HuckMan, and the fact that he isn't afraid of Grover Norquist (why would anyone name a child Grover Norquist???) endears Huckmiester to me. But...... here's the rub:

Huckabee opposes abortions, same-sex marriages, and civil unions.
Huckabee is against gun control and is an avid hunter.
Huckabee supports the death penalty.
Huckabee has voiced his support of creationism.

The guy is a Southern Baptist minister, and once worked for TeeVee evangelist James Robinson. The world is in too serious a mess, and our country is at too critical a crossroads to turn it over to another yahboob who thinks the earth is 6,000 years old, and that every word of the bible is to be taken as literal truth. Anyone who has an ounce of objectivity and an IQ above room temp can see that those positions require not just faith, but a lobotomy.

In defense of the Hucker-roo, he seems 100% more decent than the rest of the sorry sons of bitches looking for the nod from the Republicans. I hope we don't forget that his is the party of Rove, Cheneny, Gonzo, and that jack off artist Larry Craig.

On the Dems side, my dream ticket has been Gore/Edwards (Elizabeth, not John). Since that does not seem likely, and I'm not an Obama fan; I'll support JohnEdwards over Hillary for a couple of reasons:

1. Hillary could lose to the R's because she is:

A. Hillary.

B. Hillary.

2. If I need an operation, I don't want my proctologists wife playing around with the periscope up my ass, I want the GUY WITH THE ACTUAL EXPERIENCE. (No, not Sen. Craig)

One nightmare scenario is this: The general election comes down to Hillary vs. Huckary. 300+ million people in America and we end up with a choice between the woman who rode shotgun all those years in Bills pickup, and a guy in a van with a "Ask Me How I Lost Weight" bumper sticker. Fucking perfect.

R.I.P. Jerry Halloran

Just back from the Military Funeral for my friend Mike Hallorans dad Jerry. A beautiful ceremony at Arlington, and it was my honor to attend. Mike was saying that the WWII guys are dying at such a rate that Arlington is doing 30 funerals a day! I can believe that. It was good to see Mike, Brian, Kathy and his crew. Mike and his brother Brian drove cross country from CA with the ashes of his mom and dad videotaping as they went. I smell Oscar here, and I don't mean hot dog! Mike and I had a nice chat, catching up a bit. I remembered how much I used to enjoy his company, and I hope we stay in touch. I think he has some good ideas for my radio project, and the last time Happy Halloran and I did a radio thing together it worked pretty fucking well. Just ask the guys at 89X. Anyhow, Jerry Halloran was a fine man, and always kind to me. I'm glad I got to offer one last salute.

Million Dollar Dingbat

AIKEN, S.C. (AP) — A bank teller in Clearwater had a million reasons not to open an account for an Augusta, Ga., man Monday, authorities said. Alexander D. Smith, 31, was charged with disorderly conduct and two counts of forgery after he walked into the bank and tried to open an account by depositing a fake $1 million bill, said Aiken County Sheriff's spokesman Lt. Michael Frank.
The employee refused to open the account and called police while the man started to curse at bank workers, Frank said.
The second forgery charge came after investigators learned Smith bought several cartons of cigarettes from a nearby grocery store with a stolen check, Frank said.
The federal government has never printed a million-dollar bill, Frank said.

I'm guessing Alan Greenspan here had no luck getting change for a zillion when he was buying a carton of Kools.

Dog Day Afternoon

I spent most of the day yesterday at the Washington Animal Rescue League, touring their amazing facility. They have reinvented the notion of what an animal shelter should be, and what it should offer. We were given our tour by the Executive Director Scotlund Haisley, a most amazing man. This guy travelled the world looking for better ideas to house and help our furry friends, and discovered cages with bars drove the dogs insane. He studied human prisons, talked with experts, added waterfalls and smooth jazz, and in general has built a model program and facility. Here is what his fluff bio piece says on the WARL website:

Recently Scotlund has been responsible for the success of many WARL projects, most recently conceptualizing and overseeing the League’s renovation project, which will create a comfortable “cageless” shelter, enabling animals to transition more smoothly into loving homes. In addition to launching one of the world’s most progressive and ambitious shelter renovations, Scotlund has also improved the quality of lives of WARL animals through simple measures. He has paired compatible dogs in adjoining cages, encouraged sociable cats to wander the cat room, exercised animals more frequently, and employed a dog trainer and animal massage therapist. All of these changes make our shelter animals happier and more socialized which, in turn, results in more successful adoptions. In addition, Scotlund implemented a more stringent adoption process, including a visit to the prospective guardian’s home. This visit educates the adopter on the animal’s specific needs.

This is some cool stuff, it's a cool way to run a volunteer program, and it's a pleasure to meet people who are passionate about their mission. I was inspired, and almost brought home a beagle! Here is their link, do check them out:

http://www.warl.org/index.php

What Would Angela Cartwright Say About This?

IN AUGUST, radio astronomers announced that they had found an enormous hole in the universe. Nearly a billion light years across, the void lies in the constellation Eridanus and has far fewer stars, gas and galaxies than usual. It is bigger than anyone imagined possible and is beyond the present understanding of cosmology. What could cause such a gaping hole? One team of physicists has a breathtaking explanation: "It is the unmistakable imprint of another universe beyond the edge of our own," says Laura Mersini-Houghton of the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill.
It is a staggering claim. If Mersini-Houghton's team is right, the giant void is the first experimental evidence for another universe. It would also vindicate string theory, our most promising understanding of how the universe works at its most fundamental level.